What I learned at the mall for 3 hours on a Tuesday night

I spent 3 hours in the mall tonight. I also wrote a step-by-step account of the night. After re-reading I realized it was boring, so now you have the following list - enjoy.


Here are 9 things I learned while spending 3 hours in the mall on a Tuesday night:

1) Not one store sells the pens I like. Nor do any of the stores sell pens that are worthwhile.

2) Also of note - Hallmark sells silver and gold pens of some kind for writing in cards, not for taking notes or writing in a journal... unless you're "unique" like that.

3) Contrary to the intercom lady who told customers to bring up their selections because the bookstore is closing (just before 8 p.m.), it was still open after I left the store and returned to walk through to leave the mall nearly 45 minutes later.

4) When in a bookstore, I do NOT like to sit across from other people who are reading.

5) When in a bookstore, I also do NOT like to sit next to, or behind, other people who are reading.

6) When in a bookstore, I feel like a dog circling the yard over and over as I try to find a suitable place to browse my reading selections with some sort of privacy.

7) There are no clocks in the mall. Anywhere. Not on any wall, anyplace. And when you ask someone for the time, they're likely to not hear you, forcing you into an awkward situation where you have to repeat yourself and risk sounding condescending as you speak louder and slower.

8) Watching strangers flailing around in front of an Xbox video camera game thing while in public is NOT fun whatsoever. Poor kid.

9) Cruising the mall as an adult is NOTHING like it was back in the school days.