She laid dying on its footsteps
Life shattered by love and hate
The crowd gathered ‘round as it always does
…This place was no longer safe
Nor had it ever been
For many lives, countless, have lost
To our love and to our hate
…This was supposed to be ‘our place’
A place for some to rest and pray
But for others, a place to criticize
This is not a house of worship, though
A monument built in man’s eye
It is here where people gather
To give respect to fellow man
Yet also to tear them down
Because it stands for every man
Though built with great intention
It has driven so many apart
Like us, this monument, this symbol of man
May have been doomed right from the start
-
-
-
-
-
The symbol of man, our monument to us
An illustration of our totality, in accuracy
Deservedly, and
Unfortunately...
_
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Oh, How beautiful.. this is a wonderful, touching and thought provoking take on the prompt.. I am cheering for you.. well done..
ReplyDeleteLots of truth in this provocative piece - nicely done!
ReplyDeleteNice take on the prompt. Wonderful poem, this one.
ReplyDeletebrilliant piece.
ReplyDeletebravo.
love the life lesson behind your work.
We are very interested in your work and encourage you to enter our call for POETRY.
ReplyDeleteEntry forms and information can be found on the 'art calls' page at
www.new-art-review.com. You can easily upload your work online.
NOTE: The deadline is OCT 1
Thank you in advance for your time. Your work is just what we are looking for!
If you choose to enter you will have at least one poem published in the book since I contacted you!
Randy
Provocative and raw-ache heart honest work.
ReplyDeletenice write...and humble truth...nice one shot.
ReplyDeletePoetry is a way to call people to look aat their inadequacies without causing offense.
ReplyDeletethis was so well done and too close for comfort
Hope it works out with the new art thing
Moon Smiles
Your poem forces the reader to look in the mirror and into the heart.
ReplyDeleteThis is a reflective poetry. So much to thing about.
ReplyDeletethe middles makes it
This one seems to have been specifically inspired. It would be interesting to know the story behind it. Nice One Shot, JRM!
ReplyDeleteThis piece was inspired initially by the prompt over at One Single Impression. The prompt for the week is 'monument'. Once I started writing, however, it took a life of its own.
ReplyDeleteThank you all for the awesome comments!!!
http://onesingleimpression.blogspot.com/2010/09/prompt-135-monument.html
provocative piece!!
ReplyDeleteIntriguing piece that hooked me in right from the start! Perhaps some monuments need to crumble after a while...
ReplyDeleteTo me, this poem speaks of the awful truth of our own humanity, such as in the stanza,
ReplyDelete"It is here where people gather
To give respect to fellow man
Yet also to tear them down
Because it stands for every man."
Honestly writ, well done One Shot!
True words and how egoist we all can be if given chance..
ReplyDeleteGood one Shot...
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
I will great if you connect with me at Twitter @VerseEveryDay to read daily #FreeHaiku on love, life and longing
what we build we must live up to And binding with briars our joys and desires. Hope your week goes well.
ReplyDeleteWow...this is truly so beautiful JRM...:)
ReplyDeletewe build, but we destroy in the end...this is true of human nature.
there will come a time when
nicely written--
ReplyDelete